monkeys for Nana

Note to Nana-

You may have noticed five wild monkeys on your porch early this morning. I ordered them for you- you don't have to thank me now! They will be great help to you as you pack for your trip to Indiana tomorrow. They may not help you pack per se, but they will help you get back in grandma shape since we didn't have time for a full out boot camp this time.

Be warned- they are a little quirky. Instructions are as follows.

The smallest one is very cute as you can see.... but don't forget to bring wet wipes with you wherever you go- he has not had a dirty diaper in three days now so it could get ugly.

One of them has compulsive eating problems- that one likes to eat rocks, shoes, jewelry, paper, matchbox car wheels, sidewalk chalk, bugs, whatever he can get his hands on. If you need your floors cleaned, he's the one for the job. Just try not to let him get bored- if he does he will fall into his most favorite hobby- pinching and biting the other monkeys.

Another one is emotionally challenged- try not to speak too loudly, wake him up early, make him go out in public, serve him food that he likes or doesn't like at the wrong time of day, or make him wear clothes that don't match- any of these behaviors may result in uncontrollable fit throwing and crying.

Yet another one is attention deprived, so please keep all eyes on her at all times so that she can show you her artwork, her athletic abilities, her dance moves, and her hilarious bodily functions- and please don't forget to praise her abundantly.

Don't worry though, the tallest monkey is a good second-in-command. She knows how to read now, you know, so of course that means she can also make and serve dinner, run all the monkey games, and dole out discipline as appropriate.

Have fun, and drive safe tomorrow! (Don't let monkey number three convince you that he has his drivers license. He most certainly does not.)